Things never to say to a 3-year-old

Warning: This post will make reference to (actually, it's 100% about) pee and poo. I figure that most people who read this blog are parents, grandparents, or aunts and uncles, so reference to pee and poo are no big deal. In fact, if you are parents of an infant or small child, you might find yourself and your spouse talking and thinking about pee and poo much more than you ever thought possible or within the realm of sanity. But, for the sake of our other readers (I have NO idea who else might read this blog!) who might be offended or disgusted by the reference to pee and poo, we apologize in advance.

Things never to say to a 3-year-old

We have been having some fun times here at the Hemsley house regarding potty training. Potty training for pee was really no problem, once she was motivated. We used a sticker chart, and I would say within about 2 weeks, she had it down! She doesn't even wet herself at night anymore!

Ah, but the poo...that is SUCH a different (and LONG) story. It involves Norah's stubbornness, 5-day marathons of not pooping, suppositories(!), emotional distress (mostly on my part--I hate thinking about Norah not pooping), pooping in underwear (and then screaming about it!) and more. But that is not the story I want to tell today.

We have almost got the pooing on the potty thing down. Yesterday, we were playing a game, and she said, hurriedly, "I have to go poo, I'll be right back!" and she ran off to the potty. Then, she shouted from the bathroom, "I'm doing both! [pee and poo]" I said, "Good, call me when you are done!" Then, she got desperate, and needed help pulling her shorts down (they were a little tight), so I ran in there and helped her. She decided to use her small potty. So, when I left the room, she was on the small potty. About 20 seconds later, she called me and said, "I'm all done!" So, I returned and there she was perched on the BIG potty. There was pee in the small potty and poo in the big potty! I looked past this oddity, and praised her for doing poo in the potty, and she started her normal finagling for rewards. ("I get to watch a movie now, because I am a big girl, and I did poo on the potty!") I wiped her, and said, "Do you want to flush?" I knew she would, so I let her go at it, and then I realized that the pee was still in the little potty. There were two reasonable things I could have done at this point: I could have ignored it, and just poured it into the toilet after she left, or, I could have picked it up myself and poured it into the toilet as it was flushing, but no, I didn't do either of those things. I said something you should never say to a 3-year-old: "Quick! We forgot the pee! Pick it up and pour it into the toilet before it flushes!"

She twisted around, scooped up the potty with one hand, twisted back around, and poured it into the toilet. It was like the world was suddenly in slow-motion. I couldn't stop her from doing this; all I could do was watch in horror as the pee swirled ever-so-precariously close to the edge of her potty! But, by some miracle of physics, she didn't spill a drop of it! The toilet flushed, the pee and the poo went bye bye, my blood pressure returned to normal, and Norah and I returned to our game.